Deranged emperor, Massacred Saint and Goat Slapping; Wait! What’s the origin of Valentine’s Day.
In a few hours, doe-eyed couples donning red matching ,”vitenges”, will gaze admiringly into each other’s eyes and nearly biting each other’s ears with sweet nothings in the name of celebrating the wonders of love. Surely! You don’t need a calculator to know what is about to go down. The enigma of love has changed it’s wind direction, unlike when soul seekers would transact their deals across the fence in darkness. Where the best catch would disappear like vapour once subjected to public embarrassment by my granny. My granny would bark like a wild dog infected with rabies to strangers who tried to encroach on her boundaries with the aim of spoiling her granddaughters.
The wait for Valentine’s is over.The festival is just around the clock. This is the time you will find males rehearsing lanes like; 60 minutes feels like an hour without you ,(ho-ho-ho).You want her to feel special through words. I can’t wait! On the other end she hasn’t forgotten you either. The famous ladies national anthem will be sang , horizontally and vertically ; “haki beb, hii Valentine umepangaje?” You need also to buy new socks, the one’s you have been wearing are torn”. Yes you are pretty Juliet , no doubt about that, so is every second girl passing by. You need things done your way…..atleast give the poor Romeo time to put things in order. Moreover he cant arrange for Valentine’s date and buy socks at the same time. But wait, Romeo and Juliet ,have you stopped to think about the Origin of Valentine’s Day? Ahaa! By the look on your faces I can tell you haven’t, hence get ready for an exotic Valentine’s story, not much so exotic.
On 14th February each year, people around the world simultaneously celebrates love and romance. They exchange gifts bought and redeemed. I , think have found a borne to chew with you guys . So please ,grab a seat there… not there, that’s Cliff The Tall’s seat, the one next to it. Someone will hand you a virgin cocktail.
The origin of Valentine’s is a little bit foggy. But legend has it that the whole incident took place in the Ancient Rome. During that time, it is believed that Roman’s were converting to christianity but emperor Claudius was against it and thus created strict laws about what Christian’s were allowed to do. Claudius believed that Rome needed devotion and full attention from the soldiers thus passed the law preventing them from marrying. Less the other gender tricks them into eating the forbidden fruit again.
Saint Valentine the catholic priest, however began to secretly preside over the soldiers christian ceremonies in secret. Little did saint Valentine know that rumours were swirling around about his activities. And it was the beginning of his reputation for believing in the importance of love. Eventually, Valentine’s acts were found out and he was jailed for his crimes against Claudius. It is also believed that Valentine cured his jailer’s blind daughter thus,his final act of love before being persecuted was to write her a love message signed,”from your Valentine”.
Rest is history as they say. Writers came,artist came . Remanticizing about this very day and creating hypes for the same (sexuality sells) which became stronger over time. And apparently, we celebrate Valentine’s day with much pomp and glory( dont we?) Shame on you couples! (Just kidding, dont slit my throat for no apparent reason)
The point is we dont need a particular day filled with bloody and sexist history to Express our love for our better halves, do it without a special day ,do it without a need to ask for it. Enjoy your Valentine’s!